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Location: Dublin, Republic of, Ireland

Saturday, 5 May 2007

How Life Steadied Me Today

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Caption: Singaporean actress - Tan Kheng Hua Interviewed her in the '90s. Tan is gorgeous & lovely.

I find that my waywardness and my rush in planning may require a little downtime. But...

I don't want to do it and am fighting not to because I do value my readers and friends on this blog. Because then I don't know when I will come back. Have you noticed those who say they're going off for a short while, an interval etc. just never come back... This doesn't include holidays & the usual.

I could well carry on with blog reporting on literary news as I did before or writing of my reads & such until I get to a new country and just say to you, well, I'm here. I think that sort of just clears the air & any misunderstanding all around. However, until then, it may not be daily posts as before.

I'm not travelling in the way I did for 8 years. I've been sort of trying to explain that in vain for the longest time and clearly not succeeding. If another 8 years happens again, then it will have to build up gradually and spontanously like it did the last time. Because I'm now pursuing a publishing dream and writing a play when for years, these things were furthest from my mind. Which means I'll now have a different set of commitments and responsibilities.

In fact, I've just read in the Sunday papers of Singapore's popular comic actress Tan Kheng Hua who takes on a serious American film role. When working as a journalist, I did meet with Kheng Hua and speak to her once; she was a good personal friend of my Singaporean editor, James Siow. At once, I felt a rush of passion for the old quaint charm of Singapore, a little island I must have visited dozens of times. It's landscape, history and social culture is completely different to Malaysia.

I remembered I had cancelled tickets a few days ago.

Then I realised that this was life's way of warning me to take stock and that I had to plan carefully. What has happened is that after a year of a sedate life, the wanderlust bug is swirling around me with a potpurri of heavily-scented memories. Everything in the past merges together in an overwhelming fashion. I've never experienced such a lengthy heady sensation before. I must sort out my desires carefully and properly. What do I really want to do first of all etc. Otherwise, I may just mess up. :-)

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